I was speaking with a client about networking, generating leads and converting those leads into clients. He mentioned that he was debating whether or not to join a Le Tip networking group. He told me that there were realtors, electricians and bankers in the group so he didn’t think it would pay off. He said that it was easier for those types of businesses to generate leads, but for him, as a business coach, it wasn’t as clear.

A short time later he told me that someone he met years ago when he was a member of a BNI networking group had called him out the blue asking about his programs.

How long does it really take to build a relationship? How long should it take from the time you first meet someone until they become a client or customer of yours?

I met a woman at a meeting of the NJ Coaches Association. It was shortly after I began coaching, probably 2004 or 2005. We got to know each other pretty well and at some point I asked her if she wanted to work with me. She said no, but I continued to run into her fairly regularly and she received my regular newsletters.

In 2012 I ran a program and she signed up for it. In fact, she signed up for it twice.

In order for someone to buy from you three things need to be in place.

1. The Know, Like and Trust Factor.

You have to build relationships. There are definitely times where it seems to develop instantly and other times it takes a while. There are many ways to do this, but in general, think of this as developing a friendship. When you first meet someone you don’t share your deepest secrets. You go out with them for coffee, get to know them a little. Then you go out a second time, maybe for lunch or dinner and share a bit more. It takes time to build that trust.

Think of your friendships. Think of your business relationships. The trust you have in those people didn’t develop overnight and the trust your friends and clients have in you didn’t develop overnight either. And as you grow to know, like and trust each other you will find…

2. The Need.

Sure there are times when you immediately upon meeting someone recognize the need that they have and how your product or service can fulfill that need, but this isn’t always the case.

Going back to the client I told you about earlier, I knew her for about seven years before she became a client. She simply didn’t need me, or didn’t think she needed me, before that.

Think about a plumber. You may know of a plumber that you know like and trust. But it isn’t until your sink is clogged that you need him.

3. The Ask.

This is the most important part. You need to make yourself available to the people you meet. Let them know what you do. How you help people. What you might be able to help them with. Do not assume that they will raise their hand when they are ready to work with you. You must ask them to work with you. If the timing isn’t right for them, i.e.: the need isn’t there, make sure to let them know how they can reach you in the future and stay in touch with them. Remain a presence in their lives.

And the client I introduced you to at the beginning decided to join Le Tip. It might not pay off immediately but over the long term it will provide him with new relationships that start with getting to know each other, finding the needs and ultimately leading to the ask.

Now here’s something really funny. Going back one more time to the client I mentioned who didn’t hire me for seven years, she asked me a question during the program she participated in. She asked how long she should keep sending emails to the people on her list? How long should she continue calling people and networking with the same people?

I asked her how long she had known me. How many times had I emailed her or spoken to her over the years before she bought anything from me. If I had given up on her, she never would have been there and would not have fulfilled her need to learn what was being presented in that program.

The answer to her question is… stay in touch with the people you meet for as long as it takes. You never know where a relationship will lead you. Maybe that person will buy something from you. Maybe they will refer someone to you who will buy from you. And it’s also possible that you will find a need that they will be able to help you with.

How long do you develop relationships with the people you meet? How do you find out their needs? How often do you ask them to work with you?

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